so i'm going through some... ummm... whattya call it... insomnia. it's fun. it makes me cranky. on the way to work this morning, i daydreamed about killing six people. that's a significant increase from the two i normally daydream about killing on my way to work every morning.
but insomnia isn't all bad. last night, at about 3:30 am, i realized that a fantastic opportunity was staring me in the face. i could be president of the moon! i'm not sure of the process, but since there's currently nobody living there, i'm just going to "call it." so there we are... i called president. now i need a staff. if you're interested, feel free to call your position.
it's not going to be easy though. my priorities are:
- banning the importation of all kinds of fish.
- developing a free education system second only to mozambique, canada and yemen
- implementing an immigration policy strict enough to keep smokers out of my moon, yet open enough to encourage people from other planets to become residents.
- designing money with my picture on it (preferably surrounded by hot moon chicks)
oh, one other thing. i won second place in a boston pizza draw. my prize? a football video game. obviously they don't know that i don't own a video game machine dealie.
3 comments:
Unfortunately for you a man named Dennis M. Hope filed for a "Declaration of Ownership" for the moon back in 1981 (perhaps after a night of insomnia), and has made a small fortune in selling off chunks of it ever since.
I suggest a coup is in order.
Can I be Minister for Miseducation?
of course. i'll also make you minister of good ideas. the coup idea proves you're qualified.
now i need a military council. so much to do when forming a new government.
Oooh! Oooh! Pick me!
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